An alternative Christmas tale...?

'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was p*ssed.
He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!
I've busted my *ss for damn near a year,
Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear?
The old lady bitches cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money--The reindeer all fight.
Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better
Those a**holes from the IRS sent me a letter,
They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?
And the kids these days--they all are the pits
They want the impossible--Those mean little shits
I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's--No request for them,
They want computers and robots...they think - I'm IBM!
Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
I'll sit on my fat *ss and draw unemployment.
There's no Christmas this year now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde. I'm going SOUTH for the season

Santa slumming it in Florida with a blomde.reindeer surfing and working out on Venice beach .sounds a perfect crimbo.

Thats funny. Lol

i loved this really cheered me up thanx

that's pretty clever, if not very nice. did you make that up?

nice one.

AWESOME!!!
I starred ya*

you realy made me laugh, thank you

Dude, NICE!

lol...star

hahahaha.....very funnny lol....star

hehe thats ace :)